As promised, today's topic.....
I have a little rubber stamp that reads 'guilt, the gift that keeps on giving'. When I saw that stamp I knew I had to have it. Guilt has permeated my life and held me bound not freeing me to write what I want to write. I have been experiencing guilt for years for a project I've wanted to work on, but haven't for fear it would hurt my parents and grandparents. I've felt guilt for not raising my children properly--locking them out of a room while I wrote, sitting them in front of the television when I wrote, or bribing them to spend hours in the library as I did research. No child can become adults secure after those traumas.
Now they are grown however, the guilt continues. Yesterday I felt guilty because of all the projects I had intended to do last year, but never got around to them, not spending four hours writing, only two, and not updating my webpage.
While I still haven't gotten around to a lot of things, the guilt continues to mount.
On my meditation card today, it read 'guilt is destructive'. My first thought was a sarcastic 'no kidding'. The more I thought about it, I realized how guilt has paralyzed me, not only in my career, but in other things I've wanted to do.
My new goal is to get beyond the guilt. Maybe I should make a bumper sticker that says just that. Will ponder that thought for the rest of the day. What about you?
Til Tomorrow~